"All of the biggest names in 1940 Hollywood are back tonight to audition for Fiasco Pictures’ sure-to-be Box-Office Hit, The Maltese Chicken. With Lamont L’Amour already signed to play leading man, Spam Slade, it’s anybody’s guess who the leading lady might be. Penelope Purr, wife of Director Otto Ratts, is certain the role is hers, although Otto’s niece, Mitzi has her own fans pulling for her. But I think the stars’ real concern is newcomer, Kathryn Heartburn. And when movie stars get concerned, anything is liable to happen. Please join us and help judge the auditions for leading lady. At least that way the stars will have somebody else to blame everything on. Of course we’re just kidding, surely nothing will go wrong at the audition..."